First bible group meeting

While attending Big Church, the sweet lady that plugged me in, introduced me to a the new group leader. The group was only women and most of them single mothers. So I guess maybe God had been preparing me for this group. We shared part of the story of the previous church, not all the details and attended weekly but this time as listeners. I didn't want to say a word after the incident, but the holy spirit sometimes doesn't allow you to contain it, so I use to say a word of encouragement here and there, meanwhile the leader was noticing the groups reaction so he wanted me to lead the bible study one night. 

I prepared days before the meeting, I was so nervous. I didn't want to go through the same disappointment/conflict like the previous group, but I was totally wrong, it turned out awesome, everybody participated and they were very happy. The leader explained that it had been very difficult for him to handle all these women and their emotions, he was glad to know that I had been managing a group of women before and he was benefiting from it.

Months of meetings and studies passed by, we continued growing relationships at church and in the group, so he encouraged us to start our own house church. The church provided us with everything, training material, literature and Godly advice. The church welcomed our new group no questions asked. And again God called us to ministry but this time was different.

Sometimes all you need to do its to trust God, He goes before you and knows exactly where he needs you and how you are going to bring glory to his kingdom. Just be obedient and follow him no questions asked.

Big Church

September 2015

While running errands I look to my right I see this huge building, 160,000 square feet and it was a church. I was looking to plug back into a church after the incident didn't want to be derailed from my walk with God. I decided first to do some research on the Pastors history, background, negative reviews but I couldn't find any. He was a knowledgeable, humble man with lots of wisdom and experience throughout his years in ministry.
So I decided to give it a chance, this time I was super cautious. I told God I will take a break of serving, starting groups etc.. I just wanted to go to church, learn and avoid any drama. So I started attending what I am going to call "Big Church".
All I can say was wow! huge building, I thought I was going to be lost in there but the people make you feel at home and welcome. Still skeptical as I was, I started listening to the Pastor, that man was like a well of wisdom. I thought I joined a Christian University and this was "How to act like Jesus? Christianity 101". First service and God was talking, no coincidence that he explained in his preaching about the same situation that I went through in the other church. He talked that every church needs 2 churches a big church that everybody attend weekly and what they call it a home church (bible study), a place that people can gather to experience fellowship, breaking of the bread, prayer and Gods word. They explained that anybody can opened their house to fellowship and talk about God, you don't need a degree or approval from them to love one another and share the gospel.  Funny ha!, I was doing that I was almost got banned from the previous church.

You can see it clearly in this passage from the bible:
Acts 2:42-47New English Translation (NET Bible)
The Fellowship of the Early Believers
42 They were devoting themselves to the apostles’ teaching and to fellowship, to the breaking of bread and to prayer. 43 Reverential awe came over everyone, and many wonders and miraculous signs came about by the apostles. 44 All who believed were together and held everything in common, 45 and they began selling their property and possessions and distributing the proceeds to everyone, as anyone had need. 46 Every day they continued to gather together by common consent in the temple courts, breaking bread from house to house, sharing their food with glad and humble hearts, 47 praising God and having the good will of all the people. And the Lord was adding to their number every day those who were being saved.
NET Bible® copyright ©1996-2006 by Biblical Studies Press, L.L.C. http://netbible.com All rights reserved.

Well, I decided to gather more information and meet this very nice lady she asked: " First time here?", I answered: "yes! looking for a new church:. She offered to meet with me during the week to talk and get to know each other. In that meeting, I was very honest and explained to her what I had gone trough at the other church. I wanted to know if I was going to have any problems with this church, didn't want to cross any boundaries or regulations, so she was in shock and sad to hear my story and the way the handle it. At the same time she was very interested about me forming part of the church and their community. She explained that they were looking for people that can open their houses and share the gospel, pray and help the community. Her words of encouragement lifted me up, she said: "Don't be scared or doubtful about having a group that's what we are here for, to help each other out".
I answered: Ok "Big Church" lets do this!..
As one man thought I was not qualified for, anointed or good enough, another saw as treasure and divine calling for the kingdom of God.
God knows when and where he needs you, just wait and follow him!

Unqualified!

April 2015

Eight months after my father had passed my friend and I were active at our church serving and ministering others. Everything was good, but God revealed to me in a dream"start a group bible study for women". I thought to myself, God you are funny, our church has meetings for women, I do understand that there's no women's ministry but are you calling me to start one?.. 

OK let me pray about it 😅 Obedience right! ha ha

I met with my friend and started telling her about my dream and she started laughing she said "I heard that too but I was ignoring it, I think we need to pray about it'.

So we decided to pray and fast for 2 months and we embarked on the mission, God was very loud and clear about it. He showed us all the details on when to start, he also provided the name, the book, and the people.

On June 2015 we launched the group. We started as a place for women to vent, talk, cry, ask for prayer, encourage one another and empower each other to get closer to God to be better to our husbands, children and community. We were so excited! we started with are closest friends, and then the group of 4 grew to 12 in less than one month. It was amazing how we prayed for each other, the love, the accountability and we were getting closer to God. 

Months went by and one day at church one of the ladies was approached by the pastor, he asked her "where have you been, haven't seen you in a while on Sundays?", she said "my job has me working on weekends lately but I haven't missed one day connecting with God, I am attending an awesome women's group on Wednesdays and is encouraging me more than ever". He asked "who is in charge of this group"? and she told him my name. Next thing I know, I was in trouble....

The pastor called my house, spoke to my husband (who knew about the group and supported me since the beginning) and told us that he needed to meet with us.

I knew something was not right but didn't think that it was that bad.

So we arrived at his office, he called his wife to join us and started to talk to me saying that I didn't have any right to start a group without consulting them, that they had a ministry for women but that I had never participated in their meetings that were held once every 6 months and that I was not qualified by him or God to have this group.  I decided to explain to them my dream, I was not crazy, I wouldn't embark on something like this unless I heard clearly from God and He was very clear, I told them that I fasted for 2 months, plus it was outside church in my house and we were discussing life, I didn't even touched the bible. But he was very angry, he didn't care about a word I said, they humiliated me saying that some sort of spirit was possessing me, that I was disrespectful and much more. He took me out of the serving team, they demoted me, and obligated me to shut down the group because I offended his wife and the church. Almost expelled from church and embarrassed as an act of obedience I sent a message to everybody on the group and cancelled our meetings. Told everybody that the pastor requested me to shut it down and explained to them that if they had any questions that they needed to ask him directly.

He told the church and all the women involved that I was possessed, to avoid associating with me and if they continued gathering with me that they would be on their own. Suddenly, I started receiving calls from the same women who attended the group saying that I needed to repent and apologize in front of the church, others texted me casting demons out of me, and others just stop talking to me altogether. It got me to the point that I didn't have any friends left at church, only my best friend and my family.

I didn't even want to go to church anymore, I was so hurt. I didn't understand why God put me thru all of this if he himself gave me such a clear vision, I didn't do anything wrong but open the doors to my house for prayer and fellowship and nothing else. 

After the incident I attended 2 more services and God called me to another church.

At this point I know a lot of people would've said forget this following God nonsense, screw church, this is why I don't go to any church, bunch of hypocrites, controlled sheep, the Pastor is crazy. But I'll tell you something, churches are full of people that are sinners like you and me, but we cannot base our relationship with God on what others do to us or say about us. We follow God not people, pastors are people too just with a different task. They are not exempt to be deceived by the devil.

You do not need to stay in a church that manipulates the word, humiliates you or worse. God uses correction and direction with love but if he calls you to do something and you hear it loud and clear, I encourage you to DO IT! follow God not people. He has a bigger purpose and he needed me out of there so I could follow his plan and not mine and accomplish the task that he had for me.

And he said: I'm Ready!

Its been a pretty interesting 3 year journey with God, filled with hurt, disappointments, happiness, joy, patience, deliverance and trust.

After my dog died on May of 2014, I though that the pain had subsided and everything was OK, but God had other plans. A month had just passed and I received a call from my brother to let me know that my Dad had cancer in his stomach and the doctor didn't give him much time. I thought to myself, Really? first my dog and now my dad is dying?!
I was so sad, devastated and decided to stop serving God, my family and friends. In that time of grief God revealed to me that I had to put my emotions on hold to serve him. He showed me that even in my suffering I have to wipe my tears and put his armor on because there was a task that had to be completed.

My father was an alcoholic, he believed in God but never had a relationship with him. When they discovered the cancer, he was actually angry with God. He used to tell me over the phone "I don't care about the God you serve", it was hurtful, our conversations changed because I couldn't talk to him about God.

So the doctor called one last time and said "you have to come see him, there is no time". With limited resources and unable to come up with the money to pay for the plane tickets, God intervened thru a friend from our church, he called us saying that he wanted to pay for our plane tickets.

We went on our way, arrived in the morning, rented a car and went directly to the hospital. There was my dad, laying on that hospital bed with his face full of  joy when he saw my face. At that moment I knew I needed to be there, I didn't know how to approach him about God but I knew that God himself would create an opportunity for that to happen. So I prayed and let God take over.

The next day we arrived at the hospital, we met with the doctor and the staff, they said "well he is going to die there is nothing we can do here so say your goodbyes'. My godfather came to visit as well as my brother and uncle. After a few hours everybody left including my husband, It was only me and my Dad in the room. That's when it happened....He said "I'm Ready!" I know why you are here so do it, I surrender.

I was crying and shaking uncontrollably, I couldn't believe it!, and holding his hand I prayed the prayer of salvation. Until this day I don't remember what happened or what I said, but he was answering yes to everything ... it was the holy spirit doing Gods work through me. We finished, we hugged and my daddy accepted Jesus Christ as his Lord and savior!!! YES! God is so good.
His demeanor changed and he was more relaxed and happy. He even started talking about hope and peace.

We left and a few days later he got worse, but at least he was sleeping all day. Then a month and a half later he died.

I was so happy and content, he accepted Jesus Christ and that he was on his way to heaven. My family didn't understand why I was so happy when my Father had just passed, only my husband understood why and was always by my side thru all of it. God put an end to his pain and suffering, and I will never forget his face full of joy.

Welcome, I'm back!

Hello Everybody:

Sometimes we don't have a person to talk to and we feel lonely, we just want somebody that will listen to our problems and pray for us. Well, I have found the place and I encourage you to call our prayer warriors via zoom.
The group name is as follows:
Nissi Nation
The prayer call is open for you 24 hours a day.
https://www.zoom.us/join   
ID number is 599535875
If you don't want to call, you can also visit their website at www.nissination.com and email them. They will answer!
Also you can follow them on Twitter @NissiNation2018

God put in my heart this 2018 that I have to restart my blog and share with you what He has done for me and others. So this is my new mission and I hope I accomplish it.

Dealing with a loss

God always has a purpose.  Maybe sometimes it's not what we had planned

Friday evening God work through me. He allow me to meet with a dear friend of mine that I haven't seen in years,  we did a girls night out,  went to the movies with friends, had an amazing dinner and talked about how God has changed my life. We laugh and remembered beautiful times.  I got home with a huge smile on my face,  told my husband all about it and greeted my dog that was sick with pneumonia for the past week.  But God had a different plan for me. Our dog was so bad that I even lay my hand over him and prayed that God will heal him. He was gasping for air as he looked at my for help. We rushed with him to the hospital which we had visited several times during that week,  the doctor rushed him to an oxygen chamber and talked to us.

At that time my plans where saving him, doing whatever it took to heal him, even without any money.  Unfortunately no money on earth could have saved him, his condition was worse and we had to make the hardest decision of our life. We said our good byes, petted him one more time and prayed to God that he will be with him the whole way. Wow! It was shocking!..  I mean I had the best time ever a few hours ago, I was doing what God wanted me to do, spreading his word and then this...ufff was tough.. My husband and I cried for 6 hours straight, we understood that he couldn't live like that anymore, that his sickness was not going to improve and it was time to let him go. But we where not ready. I didn't blame God even if i could, He was preparing the way for the past two weeks.  And I knew in my heart that all I needed was faith.

Losing someone or a family pet is devastating, No words can heal your broken heart. Sometimes selfishness comes in the way and blame takes over. Did I do enough? I didn't hug him enough? What else could we have done? 

But is not worth it, Condemnation  is like a road with no end and I will lead you to depression. Only seek refuge in the Lord, He knows our pains and sorrows.  He was on the cross suffering while his mother watched him die, that is even worse. God is good! he knows that I will miss him, He understands that our heart is broken but life keeps on going. And this will only make me stronger and along the way I will help somebody that loses a pet or a love one.  Day by day he heals my pain,  He rubs my heart and reassures me that our furry baby is with him with no more pain, healthy and he is watching over him

God has a very different plan from what we have in our mind. But he knows that if we obey,  let go, and let him heal us we will be ready for our purpose. At the end, I will see him again in heaven.

Racism

What is racism? 
God created this world with different shapes and colors, he didn't create a black or white world. He created a rainbow full of colors, and created us in His image. We are all different,  beautiful and with a purpose. God didn't make any mistakes, he put us here with a purpose and for me racism is just plain ignorance. We shouldn't judge anybody by the color of their skin, their hair, face, the way they walk, talk, language, or even what they wear. We all come from the same father, God. We are absolutely no different and definitely special.  
I pray for those who are so blind with their ignorance that God himself may open their eyes and soul and reveal himself in a real way so that they can understand that we all are his creation and we need to treat each other with respect.