Unqualified!

April 2015

Eight months after my father had passed my friend and I were active at our church serving and ministering others. Everything was good, but God revealed to me in a dream"start a group bible study for women". I thought to myself, God you are funny, our church has meetings for women, I do understand that there's no women's ministry but are you calling me to start one?.. 

OK let me pray about it 😅 Obedience right! ha ha

I met with my friend and started telling her about my dream and she started laughing she said "I heard that too but I was ignoring it, I think we need to pray about it'.

So we decided to pray and fast for 2 months and we embarked on the mission, God was very loud and clear about it. He showed us all the details on when to start, he also provided the name, the book, and the people.

On June 2015 we launched the group. We started as a place for women to vent, talk, cry, ask for prayer, encourage one another and empower each other to get closer to God to be better to our husbands, children and community. We were so excited! we started with are closest friends, and then the group of 4 grew to 12 in less than one month. It was amazing how we prayed for each other, the love, the accountability and we were getting closer to God. 

Months went by and one day at church one of the ladies was approached by the pastor, he asked her "where have you been, haven't seen you in a while on Sundays?", she said "my job has me working on weekends lately but I haven't missed one day connecting with God, I am attending an awesome women's group on Wednesdays and is encouraging me more than ever". He asked "who is in charge of this group"? and she told him my name. Next thing I know, I was in trouble....

The pastor called my house, spoke to my husband (who knew about the group and supported me since the beginning) and told us that he needed to meet with us.

I knew something was not right but didn't think that it was that bad.

So we arrived at his office, he called his wife to join us and started to talk to me saying that I didn't have any right to start a group without consulting them, that they had a ministry for women but that I had never participated in their meetings that were held once every 6 months and that I was not qualified by him or God to have this group.  I decided to explain to them my dream, I was not crazy, I wouldn't embark on something like this unless I heard clearly from God and He was very clear, I told them that I fasted for 2 months, plus it was outside church in my house and we were discussing life, I didn't even touched the bible. But he was very angry, he didn't care about a word I said, they humiliated me saying that some sort of spirit was possessing me, that I was disrespectful and much more. He took me out of the serving team, they demoted me, and obligated me to shut down the group because I offended his wife and the church. Almost expelled from church and embarrassed as an act of obedience I sent a message to everybody on the group and cancelled our meetings. Told everybody that the pastor requested me to shut it down and explained to them that if they had any questions that they needed to ask him directly.

He told the church and all the women involved that I was possessed, to avoid associating with me and if they continued gathering with me that they would be on their own. Suddenly, I started receiving calls from the same women who attended the group saying that I needed to repent and apologize in front of the church, others texted me casting demons out of me, and others just stop talking to me altogether. It got me to the point that I didn't have any friends left at church, only my best friend and my family.

I didn't even want to go to church anymore, I was so hurt. I didn't understand why God put me thru all of this if he himself gave me such a clear vision, I didn't do anything wrong but open the doors to my house for prayer and fellowship and nothing else. 

After the incident I attended 2 more services and God called me to another church.

At this point I know a lot of people would've said forget this following God nonsense, screw church, this is why I don't go to any church, bunch of hypocrites, controlled sheep, the Pastor is crazy. But I'll tell you something, churches are full of people that are sinners like you and me, but we cannot base our relationship with God on what others do to us or say about us. We follow God not people, pastors are people too just with a different task. They are not exempt to be deceived by the devil.

You do not need to stay in a church that manipulates the word, humiliates you or worse. God uses correction and direction with love but if he calls you to do something and you hear it loud and clear, I encourage you to DO IT! follow God not people. He has a bigger purpose and he needed me out of there so I could follow his plan and not mine and accomplish the task that he had for me.